the neuro confirmed last wednesday that i have had an exacerbation. i came home, crawled into bed and watched netflix for the rest of the night. K tried to be supportive but i shut her and everything else out. i know it could be worse than a mostly numb left half of my body and a week’s worth of dizziness, but i am still struggling to get right with it. i am thankful its not worse, but i’m also angry, frustrated, scared, and sad. JUST when life was finally feeling good and normal i lose feeling in my left side and i’m dragging my exhausted ass through the week.
it all feels scary again, and i hate it. i hate that there isn’t a damn thing i can do about it except wait it out and hope that this exacerbation didn’t take too big of a chunk of neurons out with it.
i think that’s what i resent most about this stupid disease– the impotence that comes with it.